Midsomer Norton earthquake to be turned into blockbuster movie

Yesterday’s devastating earthquake that affected areas including Midsomer Norton, Bristol and Bath is going to be turned into an epic adventure disaster movie, sources have revealed.

While details are being kept tight-lipped, rumours suggest the plot will focus on the heroics of local Midsomer Norton resident Jerome Bustyfield during the earthquake’s aftermath, which was spent mostly scrambling around the home picking up garden chairs and speaking to friends on Facebook asking if they felt something.

Producer Dan Dante has claimed the movie will be a “non-stop heart-pounding thrill ride involving car alarms, a crying baby and one artisan glass flower vase that may or may not be repairable.

“You’ll have to watch to find out.”

The movie will also capture the moment the earthquake struck, which was met with a combination of apathy and mild confusion as people turned to each other mumbling “did you feel something?”.

While the movie is officially unnamed at this point, insiders have told us the film is slated to be called “The Day After My TV Aerial Fell Down“.

Tom Hardy is set to star, mainly because he’s in just about fucking everything. Him or that wrestler guy from Fast and Furious.

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