The Old Palladium on the Midsomer Norton Highstreet is actually really old, a study has determined.
Jerome Bustyfield, head of the Radstock Institute of Old Buildings, inspected the Old Palladium and concluded that the building must be, as first suspected, really old.
“Well it’s all ancient and dusty looking, so it could go all the way back to the 1980s. It could potentially be as old as Baywatch. We can all agree that’s pretty bloody old.”
“I’d say it was built by the Romans. They were always building prehistoric, dusty shit.”
Dan Dante, a councillor for Midsomer Norton, has been tasked with the buildings future.
“Honestly, the building is so old we forgot it was even there. Like most things in life really, as soon as you get old enough everyone stops caring or even remembering you.”
“However, much like the birthday of a long forgotten grandparent, I suppose we have to do something about it now that it has been reluctantly brought to our attention.
Rest assured we will be treating any potential restoration with care. Since the building was built pre-1990 we are operating under the assumption that there must be a ghost or ghosts living inside. Possibly of the formidable Vikings who presumably built it.”
“Or a pirate. A pirate would be cool.”