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Category: Nightlife

Prince Harry’s leaving drinks to be on Midsomer Norton high street

January 21, 2020January 21, 2020 RichTeaBiscuit

A spokesperson for Buckingham Palace has confirmed Prince Harry’s official leaving drinks doo will be the usual Norton high street pub crawl, scheduled for next week, with a “higher than usual” chance of winding up […]

Leave a commentNightlife

North-East Somerset election to be decided by drinking competition

December 12, 2019December 12, 2019 RichTeaBiscuit

The candidates for the North-East Somerset parliamentary seat have decided to scrap the traditional ballot election and will instead determine a winner by seeing who can down ten jagerbombs in a row. “Honestly, counting all […]

Leave a commentNightlife, Politics

Midsomer Norton pubs to open “piss heads only” sections of bar for Christmas

December 2, 2019December 2, 2019 RichTeaBiscuit

Pubs in Midsomer Norton have begun setting up their “piss heads only” sections of bar for Christmas, so their regulars can avoid queues consisting of tedious droves of festive pub goers who haven’t got a […]

Leave a commentNightlife

Prince Harry stag to take him to Crossways, Mallards and “probably” Fatties

November 28, 2017November 28, 2017 RichTeaBiscuit

Prince Harry’s stag will take him down the usual Crossways, Mallards and possibly Fat Sams route, Buckingham Palace has confirmed this morning. While many suspected the prince may have opted to go upmarket and head […]

Leave a commentCelebrity, Nightlife

Men to get drunk this weekend to support gay rights

June 18, 2016June 18, 2016 RichTeaBiscuit

Heterosexual men in Midsomer Norton are insisting to their spouses that they need to get absolutely shitfaced in town this weekend or risk being labelled massive homophobes. June 18th sees Midsomer Norton’s first ever Gay […]

Leave a commentCulture, Nightlife

Family of four ghosts delay Midsomer Norton Wetherspoons opening

March 8, 2016March 8, 2016 RichTeaBiscuit

The opening of Midsomer Norton’s Wetherspoons has been delayed after a family of ghosts have been found living in the abandoned cinema. The opening date for the Wetherspoons outlet has already been delayed before, but […]

Leave a commentEntertainment, Nightlife

Wetherspoons to open “Drive Thru” in Midsomer Norton

January 13, 2015January 13, 2015 RichTeaBiscuit

Pub chain Wetherspoons have announced plans to turn The Palladium into a “Drive Thru” where punters can capitalise on cheap booze without having to be seen in a Wetherspoons. “Being able to acquire a pint […]

Leave a commentNightlife

Norton “too dull” now all the drugs are gone

June 3, 2014June 3, 2014 RichTeaBiscuit

Midsomer Norton has been labelled dull and tedious now all the exciting drug-fuelled antics have stopped. Raids last month have dried up the area’s drug supply, giving many residents no other choice than to face […]

Leave a commentCulture, Nightlife

Humorous challenges to decide Wunderbar future

May 2, 2014May 2, 2014 RichTeaBiscuit

Councillors have opted to leave the future of the Wunderbar up to how its locals perform in a series of hilarious challenges, it has been revealed. The local council today announced that the fate of […]

Leave a commentNightlife

Everyone will go to pub early, experts warn

April 20, 2014April 20, 2014 RichTeaBiscuit

Everyone in Midsomer Norton will try and outsmart each other by going to the pub earlier than usual this Easter Sunday to try and avoid the Bank Holiday rush. Thousands of drinkers will think they’re […]

Leave a commentCulture, Nightlife

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